Tell a dog owner their dog is stupid. They will agree and say I love my big idiot.

Tell a cat owner their cat is stupid. Prepare for an excuse-heavy lecture on how you just don’t understand cats and how cats think different and what seems stupid for humans is in truth very intelligent for cats.

Your cat just ran headfirst at mach 10 into the neighbor’s Hyundai across the street when you called it for dinner.

Cat owners are the best kind of reflexive apologists.

Who can’t recognize a joke.