11/6/13 Thoughtcrime: Reasons India shot a rocket to Mars…

1.) Someplace to put a few hundred million people, make a little more breeding room back on Earth.
2.) Dell Computer Call Center.
3.) Suck it, Great Britain. It’s our turn to be colonial imperialist wankers.
4.) Been looking for a good location for a new Temple of Doom.
5.) We’re sick to death about Kashmir this, Kashmir that. You want it? Take it. We’ll take Mars.
6.) Elephants weigh 68% less on Mars. So do wives.
7.) The water is cleaner.
8.) No dangerous animals like cobras, tigers or Pakistanis on Mars.
9.) Ever since Baudhayana first calculated the value of pi and the introduction of shampoo to the world, India hasn’t made much of a contribution to the sciences.
10.) New claim to fame: First cow in space.