My Chemical Romance drummer Bob Bryar was found dead at his apartment over Thanksgiving weekend. Bob recorded, wrote, and played for The Black Parade and Conventional Weapons albums. He co-wrote several songs on the Danger Days album.

Below is a Twitter post from last year talking about his reasons for leaving MCR and his mental wellness.

Bob Bryar, Former Drummer of My Chemical Romance, Dead at 44

hi friends.
i’m going to go out on a super long limb and be the most honest that i’ve ever been in my life. probably too honest. i was going to write something like this only to my close friends but i just decided f**k it, i’ll write to everyone, whoever wants to read it can read it, i have nothing to hide. nothing to lose.

nobody knows that i’m doing this and it’s all me by myself. it will probably be a jumbled mess because i’m obviously feeling like shit, but I hope it will make sense. I have nothing that i’m trying to promote. i have nothing that i’m trying to sell, i’m just trying to get better, clear some things up, and keep going. i’m an extremely private person now so it makes no sense at all for me to do this, and it’s way out of my comfort zone, but i’m tired of people dying. i will probably regret this but….. f**k it, way too many friends are now gone and i’m exhausted so here we go.

i’ve spent years hiding from everyone because I receive so much hate that i don’t know how to deal with, and i know i probably deserve it, somehow, no matter how much i hide, i still get messages, phone calls, texts, and even letters in my mailbox, a lot of them are very nice and they make me smile, but most are pretty much telling me to die. some literally just say “DIE” and that’s it. LOL. i. really don’t understand why anyone even cares or takes the time to find me but here we are.

I am way too old for this shit so i’ve put on a tough guy stone face and pretended like nothing ever bothered me. but when i’m alone i just sit and stare at the wall and think about how things went so wrong, how i had so many friends and now have so few, and how I lost the life that I really enjoyed and worked so hard for. honestly, i’ve become a pretty lonely and unhappy dude.

i feel very lucky and fortunate so i’ve worked extra hard to help people and animals that needed a hand without ever bragging or asking for anything in return. even after trying so hard to be the best person that i could possibly be i still feel like an extremely hated dude and i’m not really sure why, when i moved into my hole in the woods most people just forgot about me and didn’t care, or never cared anyways, but the people that still come after me are too much to handle.

a while ago i made the decision to give away everything that i owned, give away all of my money, spend some time with the few friends that i had left, wipe my phone, stop talking or replying to everyone so they wouldn’t care, and then end it. peace out. i even had the note, the rope (ratchet strap for moving the motorcycles) and location (my garage) ready to go. i felt like that was the only option for me. I felt like i had lived my life and it was time for me to go. i had lost my girl of 13 years that i really needed and relied on, lost all of my pets that were like my kids, had multiple friends die or just disappear, and lost every part of the music industry that i grew up in and lived 24/7. it seemed like everyone in that world magically disappeared when i wasn’t getting them gigs, making them money, or getting them into events for free anymore. I had my wrist surgically rebuilt twice to be able to play instruments again but by the time my hand worked i was too old to start over, everything was gone. luckily for me, at the last moment i realized that wasn’t the solution. I realized that i couldn’t put my mom, my dogs, and the few friends that i had left through something like that. i don’t think anyone else would have cared to be honest.

i was in a really bad spot but i really didn’t, and don’t want to die. I was just an angry and last dude. i lost all trust in people. i still only trust a couple people now and i’ll probably be this way for the rest of my life. i also had no idea that i came off as such a jerk all the time. I never meant to. I only just realized it recently when i hit bottom and people got real with me. i really had no idea, other than my fake tough guy attitude i always thought i was a really good person that did good things for the world.

In the past I’ve made some dumb comments that were either admittedly wrong or were
very misinterpreted. i’ve learned a lot since then and i’m sorry, i really am sorry, maybe i can have the opportunity to address those comments, or anything else, to clear the air and maybe feel happy again. maybe we can be friends again, maybe we can even help someone else that is feeling shitty or alone at the same time.
i’m now mentally healthy (still physically a potato), humbled, and ready to move forward. i want to reconnect with friends, catch up with the rest of the world that i avoided for so long, and remember the experiences (good and bad) that i’ve blocked out. it’s super weird for me at this point buti want to talk more. maybe something on an app. i don’t know what everyone uses now. remember, it’s been a while and i’m an old man now, i’ve never gone on a live camera

app to talk so i’m not sure which one is best or how to use any of them. I messed around with instagram the other day when i was trying to play a game and i think i got it
figured out for the most part. i don’t especially want to be seen because i’m a fat old man now, and i hate being on camera, but

i think it’s the best way to be real. i have the username “bobbryar” on every app that i’m aware of except instagram, the instagram username is “bcbryar” because someone took my name for some reason. btw, I’d like to have that back if anyone knows how.
I’m probably opening the door for a refueled barrage of embarrassment, but this is my last try to make things fun and live a happy

life again, so f*** it again. if this turns out horribly i will just go back to my hole and not try again. i promise.

i know most of you are thinking ‘waaah, f**k
you, i don’t care, nobody likes you anymore, you’re old, just go away, etc. i’ve heard it all and i understand. but for the people who want to talk, let’s do it and hopefully be friends again. I’ve been thinking about this for a while now.

maybe this is dumb. probably. i don’t know. but if you are down i will hang out as long as
you want, if it goes well maybe we can talk more often. maybe it might be fun. it’s definitely time to have some motherf***ing fun again.
i already know that i’m going to get super
extra roasted for writing this but oh well. don’t care.
anyways… let me know if you are down. I’d
really like to have my friends back in my life
again. i really miss my friends a lot.
I’m heading back over to the DCI competition
now and i’m late, i miss this a lot too, maybe i’ll see you there, come hang out and have
some fun.
i hope to talk very soon.
-bc.