Say our country is overrun with radioactive zombie hamsters that bite at ankles, and the science from on high that is never explained says the bite from a radioactive zombie hamster causes you to turn into a Teletubbie and die. To be safe, we’re mandated to wear very heavy thigh-high lead-lined combat boots that are weighty, cumbersome, and restrictive. The protective boots make following Hannibal’s trek through the Alps with a herd of grumpy Rosie O’Donnells begrudgingly challening; or, driving the fam Suburu hatchback with standard moonroof and optional labradoodle very dangerous because of a literal lead foot; or, just going to the grocery store becomes a figurative hemorrhoid because you’re always forgetting your thigh-high lead-lined combat boots in the Suburu because it’s uncomfortable (and dangerous) driving with the boots on.

And, to not wear boots in public attracts radioactive zombie hamsters to your and you’re placing everyone around you at risk (even if they’re wearing boots), and this means above all else that you hate grandmothers a lot.

Point is, these mandated boots are for safety from radioactive zombie hamsters, and the boots more others safety than your own, so even if you don’t care about your own life, it’s selfish to risk others’ lives when all it takes is social signalling compliance. Easy. So, because no one wants to die looking like a Teletubbie and since the science from on high that is never explained tells us how to avoid turning into a Teletubbie and dying, fear alone convinces folks to wear the thigh-high lead-lined combat boots and fear alone (and perhaps election year politics) convinces the fearful to bully those, who choose to forgo boots for medical reasons and not politically-motivated reasons, using annoyingly obnoxious public purity shaming that is in socially acceptable vogue.

Just wear your damn boots.

Or stay at home by yourself.

In no way is anyone claiming the thigh-high lead-lined boots aren’t an inconvenience and weighty, cumbersome, and restrictive. Given a non-mandated choice, I feel most folks would ditch the boots and get on living life. But not everyone. And especially not the media, by the by.

So what if contrary information and facts came forth saying that there is a 0.06% chance of a bite from a radioactive zombie hamster cause Teletubbie death, and most of these deaths never are from turning into a Teletubbie but rather from preexisting underlying causes like emphysema, heart disease, and diabetes. And what if there’s no evidence anyone has turned into a Teletubbie, only surmising and guessing using the science from on high that is never explained.

Contrary information proves these radioactive zombie hamsters are actually regular hamsters who enjoy all-night raves and are all jacked up on E and just want to hug your ankles and give your ankles gentle E-saturated hamster kisses. And besides, the boots do nothing protective at all because the hamsters climb the boots and scurry down from the top and get to your ankles anyway.

It stands to common sense that if told the boots are protectively unnecessary and effectively useless, everyone would take off these boots never to wear them again, because, let’s face it, hamsters or not these boots are fashion suicide.

With solid, reproducable certainty that completely disproves the science from on high that is never explained, folks should be just thrilled to the gills about the liberating and joyful get-out-of-jail card, and feel the swell of relief to no longer be forced to wear thigh-high lead-lined combat boots.

A logical person should welcome any info contrary to mandated restrictions.

A reasonsble person should welcome an end to forced boot mandates.

An open-minded person should at the very least consider validity, weighing the two interpretations equally and make up their own mind.

But this isn’t what’s happening. What’s happening is anything contrary to the science from on high that is never explained is met with instant hostility and immediate dismissal.

How does this make any sense? Shouldn’t everyone want to done with wearing these thigh-high lead-lined combat boots? Shouldn’t everyone want to get on living life again without restriction? Why would anyone choose otherwise?

Are folks really that invested in their manipulated myopic programmed fear?

We’re going to look back on hamsters, Teletubbies, fear, purity shaming, and all of 2020 and question how we ever got so stupid.

*This is just clumsy first draft for a Thoughtcrimes article. Just archiving the ideas here. It’ll be cleaned up later.